Tag Archives: resistance

Say Okay to Life

Life comes at you hard and fast sometimes.  Often it’s tough to not take a defensive stance towards the constant borage of moment to moment life.  When you get jaded by the impossibility of saying no to life, and you really don’t feel like saying yes, remember there is always another option.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve looked at my life and said, “Why? I don’t want this, I didn’t ask for this, and nothing can make me like it!”  Doesn’t stop it from being true, and since there’s no rule saying I have to like it, there’s only one other route.  Be OK with it.

The baby is screaming, the dog just pissed on the floor, and the two year old is in emotional turmoil over lunch options. Now I can’t instantly make everything right, and I certainly don’t like the predicament, but if I breath and focus, I can find acceptance for it.

“Great! Brett’s telling me it’s ok to roll over and let life happen.  What a load off!” Well not exactly, but I am suggesting you remove the strain by refraining from fighting what is.

Faced with a life or death situation, some people might freeze, but I think most find acceptance and optional escape routes rather quickly. Even in sports, the coach doesn’t say to the team, “Alright, just sit down for the next play, we’re finished.” He says, “Ok we’re down nine points with ten seconds on the clock.  We’re going to foul the hell out em, make faces while they shank all their free throws and sink three full court shots.  Let’s go!”  Irrational optimism aside, situations like these demand immediate acceptance, and are hence approached with clarity and little to no resistance. Bringing this sober matter-a-fact attitude to everyday struggles can dramatically reduce the “drama” associated with the problems we would otherwise want to resist.

Accepting life as it is lends the quickest assistance to living your day like you want. This is not a forfeit of action, merely a mindset of allowing that leads to more living and less worrying. Try it out, and if you have any thoughts on the matter, pipe up and share with the community.  Thanks gang,




Too Busy, Not Busy Enough

Why is it when you have a lot to do, it’s overwhelming and there is just never enough time? But when there is not enough to do, there’s a feeling of lack or boredom?  I fall hard into the trap of being too busy, or not busy enough. The truth is, I am usually neither.

There are some people who are truly extremely busy, I used to be one of them. Each moment from the time they wake up, until way past their bed time, is crammed with effective work and efficiency. For most of us, this is not the case. We have a tendency to pile up our to-do list to give ourselves purpose each day and there is still a feeling of “What now?” once we’ve completed all our tasks.

I like to call this, resistance to the present. In my experience, I tend to feel this way when I don’t want to deal with my present circumstances or feelings, ie. I feel absolutely  tired right now so I should get up and do something to distract that feeling. If I were present to that feeling, I’d probably get a nap. But taking care of myself first is something I resist because my ego feels more effective when I “get stuff done”. But the truth is, I cannot truly get anything done when I don’t have enough energy, so I fall into the trap of wanting to distract, yet feeling a lack of energy to do so. Hence, too busy, not busy enough.

So how to get out of the trap?

It’s easier said then done. Don’t resist the present. 
When we go with the flow of the present, everything seems to fall in place. I get my nap, I get stuff done efficiently, and I don’t feel physically unfit to continue to flow with whatever comes into my day. There is a sense of completeness.